I was raised Christian and I’ll be honest, I find the Christianity hilarious. There was a time when I got mad at religious “ignorance”. How could a reasonable person put so much weight into such an obvious fabrication? However as I got older that anger turned to amusement.

I went to see my parents on the weekend, and you’ll all be happy to know that my Mom is still upset about the way the catholic church portrays Jesus. Apparently they’ve casted our beardy leading man as more of a Channing Tatum then a Chiwetel Ejiofor.

Hilarious right? I mean first of all, the whole nativity scene has plot holes the size of three wise men. Personally, I think if you were birthed by a virgin, you can be whatever race your heart desires… Including Elfin.

Of course, I didn’t tell my mother that.

Most people from her generation grew up in a time where a majority of people had an open faith in God. Hilarious.

Intellectually, I understand why my Mom gets upset about Jesus having blonde hair and blue eyes. Dude lived in a climate where he would have been at least brown, yet that information has been swept under the rug. It’s a betrayal of her faith. However, my self absorbed generation has given up on the validity of religion a long time ago. So none of this is a real debate for me. In fact, I’m more upset with the fact that A Tribe Called Quest can’t get their shit together to go on tour one last time.

Then, over the weekend, Idris Elba was announced as being in the running to play James Bond and boy, did fanboys light up the message boards.

There was calls of “Why would they do this? You don’t see white people playing Shaft!”

(I always forgot we had Shaft. Why do we complain so much?)

Suddenly, my mothers ideas about Jesus didn’t seem that funny anymore. On one hand, the Catholic church has used the image of Jesus to manipulate and control the masses since before I was born, so my mothers anger towards the churches portrayal of the crucified one  has real world complications.  Then on the other hand, It’s a fucking James Bond movie.

How can I smirk at someone’s belief in a man who lives in the sky when I’m directly connected to people who are upset about the complexion of a man with an exploding pen?

Here I am making fun of Fred Phelps and Fox News, completely unaware that, according to some, the very fabric of the universe will be torn apart because Hollywood decided to cast an actor with Stringer Bell/Luther range, as a one dimensional spy. This isn’t the first time race has caused major controversy in fandom, remember Thor? (Maybe this is more of an Idris thing then a race thing.) Or the Hunger Games? I still feel a bit numb when I think about all those tweets.

“why does rue have to be black not gonna lie kinda ruined the movie.”

“Kk call me racist but when I found out rue was black her death wasn’t as sad. #ihatemyself.”

“Awkward moment when Rue is some black girl and not the little blonde innocent girl you picture.”

Jesus Christ (Elfin one). It’s hard for me to understand this amount of  hate used so casually for something so insignificant. At least the Klan had the illusion of  ‘Saving the white population from extinction’.  Do you need to complain about the race of the actor every time a Mrs. Pac-Man biopic is mentioned? I think we’ll be fine with a Chinese Mrs. Pac-Man.  I know it’s hard to comprehend that we live in a world where sometimes people don’t look like you, but if you use a little imagination it makes it easier, I promise.

The real problem is that these Fan-tards are making the crazies look rational. The Jim Bakers, the Oral Roberts and even the Benny Hinns!  Christianity  is certainly corrupt, and absolutely manipulative, but at the its very core when done right, sometimes it can also be about uniting and helping people in need. What’s James Bond about again?

If you’re gonna geek out, GEEK HARD!

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Is this really a big deal? Get over it.

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